Anshul Ghiloria

Almost every woman, every girl child at some point has faced discrimination. She has at some point feared the society. I am proud of the parents who scold their sons as much as their daughters. Those who appreciate their daughters, are proud of them, teaching them and sacrificing bit of their lives to give them happiness and comfort. What I am not proud of is the mentality that girls are needed to be taken care of. I wish we had taken care of our boys more so that we never needed to do this. I wish we had created an environment where our daughters could do whatever they want, come and go whenever they want. And I am happy to discover that such families do exist. I am happy to see a woman in Shimla(a city in North India) come alone at 11 pm from work in dark streets and not afraid from anything. But in a metro city like Delhi we are scared to send our daughters late at night. These are the safety aspects and I appreciate the care our parents show for us. But there is no environment where a profession is made for women as much as it is made for men.

Why is it that when I sit for an interview for a job that requires me to work at U.S. local time, my interviewer warns me it is going to be late. Why is it that my interest in sales and marketing can’t be turned into a profession because I can not go out as much as a boy. I am strong. I am powerful. I have much more stamina than half the other candidates. I should not be rejected for a profile because I am not a man!

Why does my sister has to choose B.Tech in IT and not B.Tech in Mechanics? Why is it that my brother is studying that subject and his class has 1 out of 88 students a girl? Why do we fear that our girls won’t get job? Because a Mechanical Engineer girl does not get one and it is a fact. Civil engineering is a reputed profession and I can not be one because I am not a man!

My personal dilemma starts when my parents are proud of me that I managed to get into a professional course and they believe I will settle well in life but they argue with me not to take Marketing as my area of specialization. Human Resources may be very exciting for many people but it is not for me so it is not of much importance to me if women do better in HR. Maybe, they never got a chance in any other profession?

Being in my final year, I am as much confused as any other student of any university in their final. I have a pressure of deciding what I want to lead ahead in life. I have a choice that I want to make and I do not know whether it will be right or wrong. My parents support me and they want to see me reach heights but in the end all they talk about is getting married. What if I fail in my first job? What if I realise later this is not what I was made of? What if I decide to switch my area of interest and start from the scratch after 4 years? Maybe I should be allowed to make mistakes and come back to the starting point without being afraid that I will have to ‘settle down’ after 4 years, when my focus should actually just be paying back the society for what I gained from my education!

My biggest hurdle in my dreams is the taboo that a girl is not capable enough. The misfit notion that I am not as smart or not as professional in certain areas at least as my fellow classmates. I want to write poems and achieve heights through it. I want to touch hearts and bring tears in eyes. I want to travel all over the world, I want to visit places beyond Delhi. I want to get connected with people who are sitting  far away across seven oceans. I want to go to Himalayas, I want to pray in Sikkim, I want to bathe in Goa and I want to swim in lakes. I want to be the voice of India, sing songs about my freedom that deep down I long for.

I have amazing parents, supportive siblings. I have a proud family and I respect their efforts to pull me through everything. My parents love me as much as any parent loves their kid. They do not care if I am their second girl among the three; they believe in me. But my dreams are cloudy because of the concern they have for their ‘girl’. My dreams are hazy because I can not see everyone being happy with it. Mrs. Sharma in the neighbourhood does not care where I get a job, she does not care how brilliant I am in class. She does not care if I am sick as my parents are. She does not care if I cry or laugh. But it bothers her to see me coming home after it’s dark! I may have late class, I may have a competition and my parents know about it, but for her it is something not right!

I am every Goddess people preach and yet I am nothing for them. How does one dream when in every step she takes, people raise a question? How do I pursue my dreams without facing barricades? This is a journey all women take. While many give up, I have decided to give in all that I have to achieve what I dream because real happiness is found in deepest of our desires and I shall climb all the hurdles in my way like a ladder to my success.

(Author is Student of S.S.C.B.S. University of Delhi- Bachelor’s of Business Studies, 3rd Year)

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